COULROPHOBIA

We are celebrating *****’s 5th birthday! And they have hired a CLOWN! chapeau-clown-adulte_203362

CRAP! Maybe we can go, but leave for the clown part?

I first discovered my son’s fear of clowns when I delightedly accepted an invitation to the circus. It was going to be a special day filled with elephants, horses, tight rope walking…….you get the picture. Yep, a sensory f @#king explosion! Just add clowns….. TA DA! This made for a completely overloaded, totally panicked 4 year old! How did it NOT occur to me that a CIRCUS would NOT be a big hit with a kid who has heightened senses?!!!!

We spent the day waiting in the car……I have to admit, it was better for me too.  Afterwards…..excuses…..apologies…..

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Coulrophobia is fear of clowns. I once saw a woman in the grocery store who had a t-shirt that said, “I hate clowns.” Note to self…..l still want that t-shirt. There is a scene in the Simpson’s where a good natured Homer builds a bed for Bart with a clown headboard. This gives Bart terrible anxiety and triggers insomnia…. Bart repeats over and over, “Can’t sleep, clown will eat me.”

Clowns were not the only enemy. ANY big costumed thing was cause for a U-turn or detour! Disney was totally out of the question! (Can’t say I was too upset about that) I know someone in my brood asked if we could leave town for Halloween, not knowing that Halloween was EVERYWHERE…..not just in our little town. We spent the night upstairs while my husband answered the door. (Can’t say I was too upset about that, either.)

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I recently participated in a really tough race. It was brutal. At the finish line there was loud music, beer and a pig on a spit. Everyone was celebrating, high fiving and taking pictures. Sounds fun, right? I was freaking out. I completely shut down. I was covered in mud. The smell of the pork and beer in the air…….the utter chaos shot me into total anxiety. I found a cool dark spot that was away from the crowd and I thought, “Wow, this is how it feels to have SPD. This totally sucks.” If a clown had shown up then, it would have been the end of me.

That, or the world might continue on with one less clown.

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